Walking Through the Whole Song: Why Patience Matters in EMDR Reprocessing
In EMDR reprocessing, our job as therapists is not to be brilliant, impressive, or to “save” the client from discomfort. Our role is to meet the client where they are, hold space, and guide them step-by-step (be the navigator and hold the reprocessing map) — ensuring they remain grounded enough to stay connected to the present while ‘visiting’ the past (i.e., maintain dual awareness).
Even when we know what resolution looks like, skipping ahead robs the client’s brain of the full opportunity to reprocess the experience. The Adaptive Information Processing (AIP) model — the foundation of EMDR — tells us that memories need to be activated and associations accessed for processing and integration to occur. If we bypass parts of that sequence, we risk leaving unprocessed fragments behind.
The Record Player Metaphor
This metaphor, originally shared by EMDR trainer Kathleen Martin, compares trauma reprocessing to listening to a song on a record player. I’ve expanded on Kathleen’s analogy in my own teaching to illustrate not only the journey through the memory, but also the therapist’s role in maintaining dual awareness and pacing within the AIP framework.
When reprocessing begins, the needle drops onto a specific part of the song — maybe the first verse, maybe the chorus, maybe a painful middle section. Sometimes, that section gets stuck in a loop. The client might circle around the same emotional moment over and over — overwhelmed, tearful, or struggling to keep one foot in the present.
As therapists, we often know what the “end of the song” sounds like — calm, relief, adaptive resolution. The temptation to lift the needle and skip to that part of the song is strong. But doing so skips all the verses in between — the very moments the brain needs to experience and integrate in order to complete processing.
Instead, we walk with them verse by verse:
Supporting dual awareness — one foot in the present, one in the past.
Monitoring arousal so they remain just inside their window of tolerance — working on the edges of the window of tolerance, with activation into hyper- or hypo-arousal zones.
Allowing the nervous system to stay engaged enough for neuroplastic change without tipping into overwhelm.
When the song plays all the way through, the memory changes. It loses its emotional charge, becomes neutral, and is stored in a way that no longer drives present-day distress.
Why This Matters in EMDR Therapy
EMDR therapy works by activating a traumatic memory network while introducing bilateral stimulation (BLS) to support the brain’s natural information processing system. According to the AIP model:
Unprocessed memories are stored with the original images, emotions, beliefs, and physical sensations.
Adaptive memory networks contain resources, accurate information, safety, connectedness / belonging, and more helpful perspectives.
In reprocessing, the goal is to connect the unprocessed memory with adaptive information so the memory can be integrated.
This requires completing the journey through the memory — not jumping ahead to the resolution before the brain has linked all the relevant material.
Neuroscience Supports the Slow Walk
Trauma affects key brain regions involved in processing:
Amygdala: Generates strong emotional responses and can flood the nervous system when over-activated.
Hippocampus: Provides time and context; trauma can impair its ability to place the event in the past.
Prefrontal cortex: Supports reflection and meaning-making, but can go offline if arousal is too high.
When we stay with the client “in the song” — helping them regulate without escaping — we give these systems repeated opportunities to stay online during activation. Over time, this fosters memory reconsolidation, in which old memories are updated with new adaptive meaning.
Practical Tips for Therapists
Trust the AIP model — if the client is looping, it doesn’t always mean “stuck” in a negative way. They may be processing an important layer of the experience that needs time and space to resolve. Give them 2-3 BLS sets of the same looping response before intervening, and start with the smallest intervention — change BLS mechanics.
Resist the urge to fix — wanting to make the client feel better quickly is natural, but it can unintentionally disrupt reprocessing. Instead of rushing past discomfort, pause to notice and honour what the client is experiencing in the moment. Invite awareness of the emotions they are feeling and where they feel them in their body. Acknowledge it. Then, when appropriate, link to adaptive information — for example:
Explore what was needed at that time.
Bring in a resource such as a helping figure to meet the need.
Invite the opportunity to complete a truncated action the body was not able to finish during the original event.
Use interweaves mindfully — interweaves are for gently unblocking processing, not for steering the client toward your vision of resolution. Meet them where they are, not where you want them to end.
Maintain dual awareness — regularly orient the client to the present moment while they remain engaged with the memory. This can be as simple as:
“Open your eyes.”
“Look at me.”
“Look around the room. Notice where you are.”
Allow the discomfort — safety in EMDR doesn’t mean comfort at all times; it means the client has the capacity and support to move through discomfort without becoming overwhelmed. Hold space for them. It’s okay for your client to feel. When they experience those feelings with dual awareness, they have the power to release.
Key Takeaway
In EMDR reprocessing, patience is a clinical skill. Walking through the whole song — without skipping ahead — is what allows the nervous system to fully integrate the experience. That’s when the memory becomes another part of the client’s story, no longer holding them captive and removing the ‘gut punch’ (i.e., the distress associated with the memory).
At Elevate EMDR Academy, we help therapists refine their pacing, presence, and confidence in reprocessing — so they can support clients in completing the song, verse by verse.